This is the first post on my new blog. I’m just starting with blogging, think I’m getting the hang of it. Feels like sitting in a traffic jam, as long as you keep moving you’ll get there in the end! I may not “Blog” everyday but you never know I may get hooked and go off on a tangent. Do stay tuned for more. Subscribe below to get notified when I post new updates.
A lovely comment on one of my posts made me realise that I must get myself into gear and start writing and not give in to life’s daily traumas. When I first started, I read an article of how many blogs fail, thinking at the time this wasn’t going to be me!! But here I am weeks later thinking, actually this could be me. Not that I want this blog to fail, in all honesty it’s the time to sit down, even when I could spare a few moments all I feel like doing is sitting in peace and quiet. @home @writing @thinking
I am never quite sure what the day will bring, grumpy husband, stressed daughter, needy mother or the dog and cats not making their mind up whether to stay in, go out or just annoy me each time I’m on the phone or sit down in front of this PC.
Still not entirely sure what I think I’m doing writing this blog or attempting too but, I think it helps alleviate some of my frustrations. At the moment there is no respite from anything, not one day goes by where I have anytime to my self, to do what I would like seems near impossible, is one day to much to ask? or am I being selfish?
Sleep does not happen so rather than get wound up laying in bed pondering about work, housework, family I get up. 5.00 am, it’s tipping it down, cold too but the peace and quiet is magical, even the birds are still sleeping. That is what is so beautiful and makes it worthwhile getting up. If that is the only time I get to myself then it’s worth every minute. Some people have nothing so who I am to complain. Not that I am really complaining there’s more to be grateful for than not. Today the weather may be terrible but it could be worse. I have a home, a family, bills are paid and there’s always something to eat. I have my health, a sense of humour and I can laugh at stupid things, alot of the time the things I’ve done my self!
All in all life is good so here’s to another interesting day.
So last night after an emotionally draining day the phone rings. My brother in law, hubby at work and I was on the phone, believe it or not 2hrs 34mins. Eventually got to bed half an hour before hubby got home from work. 1.00am and still awake, drifting in and out of consciousness then my dog at 5.00am decides it’s time to get up, asks to go outside, goes outside and subsequently returns without a toilet break. Grrr, so I drag myself back to bed repeating the semi conscious state and then rolling out of bed around 9.00am. I hate getting up late as it throws me out for the rest of the day, plus the fact I feel like the walking dead. On a positive note, more marking of the granddaughters college work, seen mum, hubby got the new heater put in the bathroom and daughter feeling more positive than yesterday. As for the dog he’s spent most of the morning sleeping 😊. #exhausted #sleep #consciousness
Yesterday we actually got the hall floor tiled two years after we’d had it newly tiled, this time due to a radiator that decided to leak when we had a planned weekend away. Luckily our daughter was at home dog sitting and managed to stop it. The poor guy who laid it the first time nearly froze as the weather had turned so much colder, the glue took ages to dry, the grout didn’t want to dry even with the heating on extra high and I was still washing it before bed. But it looks good, so worth the wait. In between trying not to let the dog escape out the front door, daily visits to see mum, going over homework for my granddaughter I somehow managed to fit in a shower, cook, clean and have enough time to eat 😁.
Today started off with the usual routine of sorting the pets out, very happy to say there’s been no vomit or poo to clean up, at least not inside. This week is definitely not the normal, hubbies shift week is usually exhausting, he gets home at silly o’clock disturbs me, the dog and cats who, think it’s time to get up, “oh it’s play time let’s see what noisy toys I can chew and I might even bury it under their pillow if they don’t play with me” by this time I’m awake. After several hours in and out of consciousness I get up, but after the mistaking a dead leaf for poo the other day I make sure I put the light on!! A normal day? Not sure I even know what one is if there is such a thing. Hubbies friend turned up this morning and of all things they went to see a different fishing lake! Crackers yes it’s been tipping it down. Talking of crackers actually sat down and started making some for Xmas I’ve been planning so they’re all environmentaly friendly. Other crackers is my daughters x partner, she’s spent years traumatised by him, she’s now getting stronger and at long last is sticking up to him, which is good as today the verbal abuse and language is far from desirable, in fact it’s discusting. Going into a counselling mode and trying to be impartial is getting harder as it’s frustrating seeing someone so upset, angry and distraught. At least she is beginning to laugh again, I always say laughing is the best medicine. #crackers #trauma #normal #floor
I’m a bit of a giggler, not so helpful before getting ready for a staff team meeting though. Up at 6.00 am so plenty of time to sort the dog and cats out, a nice cuppa while catching up with the news or so I thought. Just got sat down when one of the cats decided to start coughing which resulted in projectile vomiting across the kitchen floor, cleaned that up so decided to wash the whole floor while I was at it. Managed to put the cat out, noticed what I thought was a dead leaf (not got the light on) picked it up and to my horror it was poo which was hastily dropped, got a poo bag and disposed of it, scrubbed the mat, drank by this time my cold tea and subsecently howled with laughter. Why? I have no idea but the best laid plans never seem to go according to plan and it takes less energy to laugh than it does to start the day stressed, let’s face it life’s to short to worry about things that can be fixed. I did manage to shower, hair washed, makeup on and arrive on time. So all in all a good day 😁.
I am never quite sure where time goes. A typical day when I’m not working is 9.00 – 9.30 am see mum to make sure everything ok. Another visit mid morning, after lunch, then mid afternoon spend half to an hour making a drink chatting etc, back again anywhere between 16.00 -16.30, 18.00 and the last visit at 20.00.
Today hubby on a late shift so not much done other than visits to mum, putting out rubbish and anything else that may be needed. When hubby on shift he tends to constantly ask me what I’m doing or decides he wants the PC when I want it, goodness only knows how I got through University.
My recently moved in daughter is doing well and quite upbeat, actually persuaded her to draw up an action plan to re-start her art work, even though I say so myself she is an amazing artist. When I figure out how to load some of her work I will!! Watch this space.
It doesn’t sound like a lot in a day but that’s in brief and the day is fast approaching evening and with the darker nights creeping in my body thinks it’s got to go into hibernation mode. Is there any time for relaxation? Relaxation? not quite sure how to anymore.
Dare I say I’m getting the hang of it? Mmm, don’t know, maybe, sort of, I say to myself while still trying to figure out what and how to use widgets.
The whole purpose of trying something new was to see how many people find life, has been and is, getting more hectic as we get older and hearing how they deal with life stresses and coping mechanisms.
You may wonder what on earth I’m talking about, so briefly ( I’ll talk more depth as I feel confident with writing). I lost my brother several years ago and instantly felt responsible for my parents. My husband, mum, dad and I decided between us that our garage would make a nice bungalow for them, of which it is. Dad died suddenly leaving us to look after mum. Bless her she can’t drive so is totally reliant on us. Although she’s fairly independent there’s lots of things to help with such as collecting post, emptying rubbish, shopping and various appointments as she gets older. Then, when you think the kids are settled one of them leaves their home and arrives with rather a lot of unforeseen baggage. Nothing that can’t be sorted. Then with trying to work, look after the house seeing the other children and grand children the year has gone, we’ve survived Christmas and here it is fast approaching again.
All in all I believe that there’s a positive outlook to most things and maybe it keeps me young and active. Although, I’m not immune from an anxiety I don’t recognise, sleepless nights and frustration, in fact, the hardest part is staying calm on the outside while being about to burst into self combustion on the inside.
I could possibly talk about this for ever as there’s always instances when someone will tell you, you shouldn’t be doing that! I’ve often thought that there’s no manual out there that states what age we should be doing whatever, how we should dress or wear our hair. Does it say when we should give in to nature and let the grey take over? Not that I am giving in to that as I love a bit of red. Hopefully I’ll still be wearing jeans, keeping up with pop music or anything else that may be deemed as for the young for as long as I can. Admittedly my head sometimes says yes you can when the body says don’t be stupid. #age #thoughts #dress sense #hair
Quite honestly I never thought that turning 60 would be as challenging as it has become. It appears that typically, we’re dealing with more baggage and complex issues than when we were younger, lets face it bringing up children and the trials and tribulations that go with that are challenging enough without all the other dramas that life throws our way. It’s quite funny really that we’re told, you’re too young for that, you’re too old for that, by the time you’re the age…. You’ll be outgrown of this that or the other! #zerotohero #children #elderlyparent #parenting